Posts by Coffee House Girl

37

Update: I got the shun at my dad's funeral- the best outcome really!!

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

hello all jwn .

so glad to have that over with- it was surreal to walk in the kh after two years...it is just a building to me now (not "jehovah's house").

i must say that now i'm on the outside...what a boring sad building- the people were not joyful and friendly (just older and fatter than i remember)- i got the nervous stares and shaky "hi" when i looked at all of them and said hello.. my mom was sitting all by herself in the front row of the hall...i went and sat by her side.

Coffee House Girl

Thank you everyone for your well wishes, they made me smile this morning- this is the first morning I havent cried since this all happened....things are slowly getting better I know I still have a process to go thru...but all your love and genuine support is appreciated

Oct Prince- loved your poem....made me laugh, you r clever

How is my brother doing Discreetslave asks? Thanks for asking, he seems to be doing better also- He left the "truth" when I was about 5 or 6...so he has been out of it much longer than I. He didn't remember what JW funerals were like, as soon as we got out of the door he said "it was nothing but a f*cking sunday sermon!"

Have a great monday JWN

CHG

37

Update: I got the shun at my dad's funeral- the best outcome really!!

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

hello all jwn .

so glad to have that over with- it was surreal to walk in the kh after two years...it is just a building to me now (not "jehovah's house").

i must say that now i'm on the outside...what a boring sad building- the people were not joyful and friendly (just older and fatter than i remember)- i got the nervous stares and shaky "hi" when i looked at all of them and said hello.. my mom was sitting all by herself in the front row of the hall...i went and sat by her side.

Coffee House Girl

LV101 & NC: Thank you for your well wishes and telling me to take time to grieve and rest- that is really the best comfort to me now :)

TotallyADD & Reopened: My thoughts are also with you both now having read more about your stories...I am sad for both of you, yet happy you are here on JWN to help people like me get through this: your story does help- thank you for sharing it

CHG

37

Update: I got the shun at my dad's funeral- the best outcome really!!

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

hello all jwn .

so glad to have that over with- it was surreal to walk in the kh after two years...it is just a building to me now (not "jehovah's house").

i must say that now i'm on the outside...what a boring sad building- the people were not joyful and friendly (just older and fatter than i remember)- i got the nervous stares and shaky "hi" when i looked at all of them and said hello.. my mom was sitting all by herself in the front row of the hall...i went and sat by her side.

Coffee House Girl

Man in Black,

here is the poem...I looked thru dad's books that he read- this came from a book he had since 1952 (& it was signed by the original author)

What did the JW's find offensive??? it was the reference to Whiskey and "not dying" (WTF)

Oh, I would not die in winter

When whiskey punches flow,

And the pretty girls are skating

O’er the fields of ice and snow;

When the sassige nuts are thick,

Oh who would think of dying,

Or even being sick?

I would not die in the springtime,

And miss the turnip greens,

And the pretty song of the little frogs,

And the skylark’s early screams;

When the little birds are warbling,

And the ‘taters’ gin to sprout,

And the turkeys all are gobbling-

Oh who would then peg out?

I would not die in summer,

And leave the garden sass,

The roast lamb and the buttermilk,

And the cool place in the grass;

I would not die in summer,

When everything’s so hot,

And leave the Whiskley juleps-

Oh no! I’d rather not!

I would not die in autumn,

With peaches fit for eating,

When wavy corn is getting ripe,

And candidates are treating;

For these and other reasons

I’d not die in the fall,

And since I’ve thought it over,

I would not die at all!

37

Update: I got the shun at my dad's funeral- the best outcome really!!

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

hello all jwn .

so glad to have that over with- it was surreal to walk in the kh after two years...it is just a building to me now (not "jehovah's house").

i must say that now i'm on the outside...what a boring sad building- the people were not joyful and friendly (just older and fatter than i remember)- i got the nervous stares and shaky "hi" when i looked at all of them and said hello.. my mom was sitting all by herself in the front row of the hall...i went and sat by her side.

Coffee House Girl

Thank you cult classic! appreciate your sympathies

Blondie- no I am not DF'd, but I suspect that after I sent the cease and desist letter (a copy did go to my bro-in-law who is COBOE)- they did put in a warning that I was dangerous and I've heard the expression before by JWs "they may as well be DF'd even tho it is not official". My mom did tell me that the elders have talked to her about stopping association with me

Shamus- Ah I feel the love and the hot breath of monkey kisses... back at ya babe

Shirley- Yea...I am suprised I didn't get a "come back to Jah so you can see him in paradise"- I would've shot back with a...well according to JW doctrine a man who did not give field service time to the org & was smoking wouldn't be resurrected so I guess I wont worry bout it-

Quendi- ah thank you for your voice of reason, death is never easy for those left behind, and I know with time present wounds will heal- and Dad would want me to move on with my plans- he told me not long before he passed that he could sleep now with a smile on his face knowing I was happy....aah thats the way a parent is supposed to feel-

CHG

37

Update: I got the shun at my dad's funeral- the best outcome really!!

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

hello all jwn .

so glad to have that over with- it was surreal to walk in the kh after two years...it is just a building to me now (not "jehovah's house").

i must say that now i'm on the outside...what a boring sad building- the people were not joyful and friendly (just older and fatter than i remember)- i got the nervous stares and shaky "hi" when i looked at all of them and said hello.. my mom was sitting all by herself in the front row of the hall...i went and sat by her side.

Coffee House Girl

Hello all JWN

So glad to have that over with- it was surreal to walk in the KH after two years...it is just a building to me now (not "Jehovah's House"). I must say that now I'm on the outside...what a boring sad building- the people were not joyful and friendly (just older and fatter than I remember)- I got the nervous stares and shaky "Hi" when I looked at all of them and said hello.

My mom was sitting all by herself in the front row of the hall...I went and sat by her side. The service began with the usual 5 minute introduction & 20 min sermon complete with invitation to "come see any JW if you want to learn more". I wanted so bad to ask my nonJW relatives what they thought-

The speaker was a brother who is my age (30's), and never really had a conversation with my dad ever in his life- when he spoke about the resurrection, he said that "these are the thoughts that my father entertained"- I tried not to laugh at that one...knowing how dad felt, I'm sure he found JW doctrine "entertaining" to say the least!

When it got to the end we were invited to stand and sing "Life without end at last"- I looked down at my program- I put a picture of dad inside of the program next to the song...he rarely smiled so this was a pic of his usual stern face- he was looking back at me thru the picture as if to say..."what the hell are all these a-holes doing here???" I also had to fight back the giggles....I'm sure the speaker looked at me puzzed wondering why I had that scary smile/half laugh on my face.

It was done, and everyone piled out of the KH to get to the food....my mom thanked me for comming and said I didn't have to go to the dinner if it made me uncomfortable (which really meant..."you will make everyone uncomfortable, and make them feel like they cannot eat with you because of scriptural decree)- so I took the hint and told her that I wanted to take my dog for a walk. My brother and I left together. My sister, brother in law, nieces, cousins never said one word to me- (I did have one aunt give me a hug, and I talked to my non-JW relatives..but that was really it)

So now that is done & I can go back to grieving my dad in a somewhat normal way- I already miss him, saturday was the first week without seeing him (I would go home every saturday to see mom and dad, and walk the dog)

I plan on inscribing the poem that the JWs made me take off the back of the program because they found it offensive onto a piece of wood and placing it next to his headstone....I will get my way, I will represent him the best I can, and all the JW's can just fu*k themselves if they can't take a joke-

Thanks for your help all!

CHG

49

Anyone wanna place a bet on what will happen to me when I have to go to the Kingdom Hall this Saturday??

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

well since there is no "betting" (as it reeks of gambling) in jdub land, lets place a friendly wager on what will happen to me when i go to my father's "memorial" service at the kingdome hall this saturday..... to give you newbies background info: i am neither df'd or da'd- i left 2 years ago with no explanation.

i have been hounded by elders in my cong because they have suspicions that i am living with a man, but they have no proof (well, no proof in jdub land- you know...two witness rule).

after many attempts to get me to meet with them- i finally sent the elders a "cease & desist" letter after one of them spied in my miniblinds to see me eating breakfast with someone (they couldn't identify who).

Coffee House Girl

NVR2L8- thanks for the update! I'm sure you were relieved to not have to face that - sometimes it is better to stand your ground and not give the dubbies false hope-

I'm so glad to have my ordeal done...I got the shun- but that was okay by me...I skipped out on the meal afterward since I knew the dubbies would be very uncomfortable with the dilema of having to eat with a "wrongdoer" such as me..so I made it easier on them and skipped out!

Ahhh....now I can try to grieve like a "normal" person-

Thanks everyone for your concern & sympathies...they really did help me :)

CHG

57

The Real Issues Facing former Jehovah's Witnesses

by AllTimeJeff in

jw
friends

on internet forums such as these, it is to be expected that there will be people who want to save jw's.

esp from (thinking for) themselves.. however, the real dillema's facing an ex jw who leaves, whether on their own terms or being disfellowshipped are real and haven't changed.. .

lonliness, how to make friends, is a big issue.. fear, esp fear based on superstition, a fear of god and of the future that is not in any way based in proveable fact.. education, how to think and reason critically to avoid being taken advantage of is a big challenge.. love, sex, and how to navigate your way around all of that hot mess.. geez, yeah, forgot.

Coffee House Girl

I wouldn't have "progressed" this far (sorry about the Jdubism) without JWN's support and insight- I hope to pay it forward

Great thread...I feel the love

CHG

49

Anyone wanna place a bet on what will happen to me when I have to go to the Kingdom Hall this Saturday??

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

well since there is no "betting" (as it reeks of gambling) in jdub land, lets place a friendly wager on what will happen to me when i go to my father's "memorial" service at the kingdome hall this saturday..... to give you newbies background info: i am neither df'd or da'd- i left 2 years ago with no explanation.

i have been hounded by elders in my cong because they have suspicions that i am living with a man, but they have no proof (well, no proof in jdub land- you know...two witness rule).

after many attempts to get me to meet with them- i finally sent the elders a "cease & desist" letter after one of them spied in my miniblinds to see me eating breakfast with someone (they couldn't identify who).

Coffee House Girl

A Guest- ah yes...I tried to ask my parents about funeral planning and they didn't want to do it...always hard thing to ask- Mom did keep her promise to bury him in a casket and not cremate him, but she figured I'm sure that since he is "asleep in death" it doesn't matter to him if he has a JW funeral instead of just a graveside service

I will get my arrangemnts in writing...I just purchased a burial plot next to my parents, thats a start...

CHG

49

Anyone wanna place a bet on what will happen to me when I have to go to the Kingdom Hall this Saturday??

by Coffee House Girl in

jw
friends

well since there is no "betting" (as it reeks of gambling) in jdub land, lets place a friendly wager on what will happen to me when i go to my father's "memorial" service at the kingdome hall this saturday..... to give you newbies background info: i am neither df'd or da'd- i left 2 years ago with no explanation.

i have been hounded by elders in my cong because they have suspicions that i am living with a man, but they have no proof (well, no proof in jdub land- you know...two witness rule).

after many attempts to get me to meet with them- i finally sent the elders a "cease & desist" letter after one of them spied in my miniblinds to see me eating breakfast with someone (they couldn't identify who).

Coffee House Girl

Thanks for your kind words everyone! I will pass them along to my brother-

NVR2L8- I hear ya....when you know your going into a situation where you face either fake niceness or an inquisition- hidden agenda's make by ass twitch- hope you can find a way out of that one-

Jamie- I hopefully will be able to escape with my brother and we can go catch a bite together in peace

Flipper- always keeping me on the task of a successful fade :) thanks so much

Scott77- you do bring up a good point & I will be sure to watch my back- thanks

wish me luck tomo!!!

17

How Did You Deal With God Destroying Non-Witness Relatives that You Loved?

by DNCall in

jw
friends

startfragment.

so many of my non-witness relatives were, and are, good people.

i had to do something to deal with the likelihood of their being destroyed.. those i was close to in the faith, and i, had the hope that, sometime before the end, some issue would arise that would wake up our relatives and other loved ones to the realization that they had to come into the fold.

Coffee House Girl

As a child I would pray with my mom everynight and ask Jeh to help my dad and brother come back to the "truth"- when I would ask mom what I would do if Armageddon came and dad and my bro didn't make it...how would I get through that??

My mom told me that Jehovah would take care of my feelings of grief- she made it sound like Jeh would shut my mind off to the grief like He shut the mouths of the lions for Daniel...that I would feel nothing at all

that always made me feel hollow....

CHG